I live in western PA, a hilly, cold region that can sometimes get a great deal of snow. While having a vehicle with 4 wheel drive is nice (except when you need to pump gas), my driveway is another matter. It’s extremely long and curvy, and has a little valley in the middle of it. Combine that with the extreme amount of snow we got dumped on with, and it’s not pretty.
I’m watching the Pens game on Sunday, hours before the Steelers are supposed to kick-off. I went out to see if I could clear the part of the drveway near the road with just one lonely shovel. Tommy was in a pissy mood, trying to operate the snow plow attached to the tractor. He has a snowblower, and has for a few years, now. Thing is, it’s broken and Tommy doesn’t know why. He keeps muttering that he needs to figure that out, but he never does and he never lets anyone competent take a peek, either. It’s my opinion that he just needs something to worry about.
I trudged down the driveway during the 2nd intermission of the Pens game. I had no illusions about getting back in time for the 3rd – it’d probably start before I even got to the road. I left it on, though, so I could rewind the DVR later and watch it. After the trek through deep snow, I got there and started shoveling. Maybe it was because I didn’t eat anything that day, or maybe it was because I wore too many layers, but I didn’t last too long. I carved out a small indentation and was working on the mailbox area when I started getting tired and dizzy. I’ve felt this before – once during a soccer game and once during a practice. I was going to pass out or throw-up. Maybe both. Since I was near the road and didn’t feel like having cars pass by and see me like this, I decided to cross the road and over to my mother’s place – luckily located nearby. I rang the doorbell, and waited for her to open. She did, I mumbled something Tommy-like since my speech was slurring, and stumbled past her to the bathroom.
Now, my mother is not a great housekeeper by any stretch of the imagination, but I had no problem immediately slumping down onto her floor and using my sweatshirt as a pillow. With me, having a cold bathroom floor under me always makes me feel better. I think I stayed there for about 10 minutes, then got up. My mom was a bit worried and offered me some hot tea. I figured it was a good idea, so I at least got to watch the last of the 3rd period as the Pens blanked the Rangers. While this was going on, she got a call from Tommy and told me, “You might want to take a look at this…” I looked out her front window and saw a large red lump in the middle of the driveway. It seems Tommy decided to be a hero…or an idiot. I’m not sure which term best describes him attempting to take his car down an unplowed driveway like that. He asked my mom to call the guy she uses to plow her driveway, and bitched how everyone was “stupid” for not already offering to plow ours. She called the guy, but he evidentally broke his plow somehow.
After a bit, I went back outside. I felt good enough to help carve out my brother’s car, who was parked in her driveway. It got plowed in and he was already parked near the snow bank on the car’s left. He’s a horrible driver, and thought gunning the gas pedal was the best way to get out of snow. I helped him shovel, then directed traffic while he backed into the road, then gunned it back into my mom’s driveway. He was still about 8 feet from the road, but he was happy that he’d be able to leave a bit later on. I finished the end of my driveway ( I carved a 15 foot-deep area out), then made my way back up the hill. I was tired, sore, and not moving so fast. I finally got back inside, while edging my way past Tommy’s trailblazer and snickering. Tommy was amazingly in a good mood when I got back, and asked if I’d get the Jeep out later to help tow him out. Fine, but I was gonna rest for a bit.
My sister called, and said that her husband Ben was on his way over. Now, he has a 4-wheel drive car, but he still wasn’t making it up the driveway. I asked why, exactly, he was still planning on trying. She shrugged (I could feel her doing that over the phone), and just said, “Ben likes to play in the snow.”
…
Ok, fine by me. Later on, I went upstairs to look out a window, and saw Ben stuck in our driveway near the road. I wasn’t surprised, but then he got out and parked on the side of the road. That surprised me a bit since there wasn’t really a shoulder for him to rest on. He was halfway in the lane. He jumped out and ran over to my mother’s. I soon got a phone call while I was watching all of this. It was my mom and she asked me if I would walk back down with a shovel to help clear her driveway a bit. Seems Ben wanted to pull Lance’s (my brother) car forward more, and pull his in behind him. I tried to explain that while I would normally help, there was no way in hell I was walking a roundtrip driveway tour again, and by the time I got down there, they’d already be done. I felt kinda bad, but I still watched Ben and Lance frantically shovel from a distance.
After Ben parked his car in a safer area, he got his daughter, put her on his shoulders, and grabbed a shovel. He then walked up our driveway to the house. At that point, most sane people would say “fuck you” and go home, so that was nice of him. I figured this was a good time to grab the camera, suit up, and head out to see what was going on.
Here’s Tommy’s vehicle. Near the top of the pic, you can see my mom’s place – the red brick house across the street.
Here you can see Ben shoveling out the back tires. At this point, Tommy was still in the house. I had already warmed the Jeep up, and was waiting for Tommy to get the damn tow rope out. He came out, and tried to drive his car out. Still not happening. He then wanted to shovel some more. I started to get aggravated, and asked him where the tow rope was. I figured pulling him out was way easier than what we were doing. I tried to listen to Tommy’s description, gave up looking for it, and asked Tommy to go find it himself. He then went, couldn’t find it either, then found some strap used to tie down loose stuff that you carry in truck beds. Fine – hopefully it’d work. We then went around to the back of the jeep and saw that there wasn’t a hitch or hook to tie the damn rope to. Weird. I offered to sit in the back with the hatch open, and hold onto the rope while the other end was attached to the trailblazer, but they declined. Here’s a video:
http://s157.photobucket.com/albums/t61/dooxy/?action=view¤t=Clusterfuck007.flv
This is taken while Tommy is still nowhere to be found. That’s Ben operating the plow.
Finally, Ben got in the Trailblazer and Tommy and I pushed. It made progress, and we finally got his car back on the flat, plowed area of the driveway. I figured this would be a good time to interview Tommy, but he wasn’t feeling so talkative:
http://s157.photobucket.com/albums/t61/dooxy/?action=view¤t=Clusterfuck008.flv
Yeah, I didn’t get that, either.
Thankfully, the Steelers won their game and are heading to the Superbowl (whoot!), so that helped cap off the evening. I don’t really have a good closer to this entry, so here’s a pic of my kitty Binx trapped in a plastic bag:
Awwww….
